He'll blind you with the glare
from his spotty bald head.
His shifty little eyeballs
are beady and red.
He comes from a family
that's thoroughly inbred.
Pray he keeps his shoes on
for he has stinky feet,
a piping little voice
like a newborn lamb's bleat,
and despite all this
he is full of conceit.
He seeks out new prey
in the personal ads.
He abandoned his girlfriend
and the children they had.
He doesn't even know
that he is a grandad.
He's got a microhead
that looks more like a node.
He drives an egg-shaped car
up and down the road.
He's got more poison glands
than the average cane toad. - Jeff Barnes
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